Happily Ever After, Part I: The importance of setting priorities for your wedding

Written for DM Photo by

Katie Kolesar, Scottsdale Style Maven

With the popularity of TV shows like Bridezilla, we are all acutely aware of how an event thought by many to be the most important moment of a woman’s life can tend to be a bit stressful. Planning a wedding starts out with the romance that comes with getting engaged. Everyone want to know how he ‘popped the question’, and of course, what will be coming next! All the little things that converge and culminate into your wedding day are just that- little things. Not little in importance, read: little as in there are just lots and lots of them to do, and not ever enough time to do them all. The problem with little things is that there are too many of them to begin with, and they somehow start to multiply faster than gerbils on Viagra!

As someone wise once said, “hindsight is 20/20”. I can speak with authority as one who had a dream of fairytale perfection for her own wedding, where everyone shared my vision and knew exactly what to do and when to do it, ready to lend a helping hand or defend my choice of having a gold-colored wedding cake, for instance. As I progressed in the planning stages, I woke up to reality as I began to understand that everyone involved in my wedding had their own perfect idea of how it should take place. So, instead of just dealing with all the little details, and getting the logistics put in place, I also had the burden of rallying the troops to get on the same page. Easier said than done. Strange politics are involved when you are fighting a covert war of smiles and agreeing to disagree, whether it’s with your mother-in-law to be, the maid of honor, or that especially helpful wedding comrade, the groom.

That said, it is a very tempting idea to stick to your guns and still try to pull off the wedding of your dreams. In order to have a chance of accomplishing this, plans must be made early and clearly, and they must be made by you (the bride). Let’s face it, this is your day, and though all others want to do is help, the leadership role is yours to fill. The best way to go about taking the lead is to make a list of your key priorities. Before involving anyone else in the idea stage, sit down quietly by yourself and write out your list of priorities for your wedding. This could include a specific location that is meaningful to you, specific music that you would like to have played, a theme or style that sets your wedding apart, or a special officiant to perform the ceremony. Do you want it in a church, on the beach, on a mountaintop, in your backyard?

Prioritizing is the first in a series of crucial elements that will directly impact whether you realize your vision for your wedding. Otherwise, there are several outside factors that can and will cause you to lose control, if you don’t take measures to prevent it. This is the one and only moment when things can be up to you, and your budget. Be sure to get them all down on paper, on a numbered list, because once you spell out your priorities, the next steps will inevitably be compromise and revision.

Some key priorities to consider are:
1. Number of guests on your guest list. (This can dictate other important decisions such as wedding and reception location, meal and entertainment choices, wedding party, etc.)
2. Budget. (This is key for you to keep control of decision-making, wardrobe, and preventing hurt feelings or guilt.)
3. Delegating. (Choosing a reliable helper, hiring professionals such as a wedding photographer, wedding planner and stylist.)

Once you’ve pinpointed your priorities for your wedding, it will make all subsequent decision-making and planning less overwhelming, taming all those to-do lists in one fell swoop. Taking the time to jot down your list will help the details fall into place much more easily and efficiently, ensuring that you will arrive at the altar with all of your hair still attached to your head. For more in-depth information on the above-mentioned topics, check back soon!

Cheers,

The Maven

email me at: maven@scottsdalestylemaven.com
http://scottsdalestylemaven.com